By Darryl James
There is a choice to be made.
We must be conscious and choose for ourselves, otherwise others will choose for us.
We have to choose between loving each other or embracing the growing acrimony that is festering on both sides of the gender divide.
Black men and women are at war with each other in many corners of this nation. Hateful things are being said back and forth, and things are getting critical.
The ugly truth is that many of us have no idea how to have a conversation.
Both sides say things that are inflammatory, while expecting a real discussion to ensue.
Hate is hard to resist.
It's like the dark side of the force-its evil, but seductive. It's like the matrix-you can become a part of it and not even know that the real world has ceased to exist.
The problem with people who are essentially self-hating, is that they have been laying their ignorant hatred on everyone and no one has checked them properly. The lack of checking has given them a false sense of relevance and a reason to share their vile brain defecation with other people they infect.
Stephanie Mills sang a song about learning to respect the power of love. It is real, because love is powerful. But we must also learn to respect the equal and opposite of love--hate, which is just as powerful.
You see, as humans, we are but vessels. Whatever you put inside is what will grow and spew forth. If you fill yourself with love and good thoughts, you will be a nicer and more loving person. If you fill yourself with hateful thoughts and listen to hateful angry messages, you will spew meanness without even realizing it all the time.
That's what is affecting some of our sisters who imagine themselves to be gentle, loving women, but cannot understand why men they desire do not want to be around them. There is nothing desirable about a woman who views all men from a negative perspective.
At some point, it has become tiresome to hear about the lack of good Black men, because people are still getting married, which means that maybe some people just aren't getting what they want because they are not meant to have it. Or because they are not prepared for it.
And we are hearing more and more vitriol from men. There is a difference between being a strong man and someone who simply carries a bad attitude close to being bitchy.
Who started it?
Who cares?
Let's just work on the resolution.
Making hate instead of love is not the resolution.
We have to find a way to communicate with truth as the basis, leaving the trauma from the past behind.
We have to find a way to begin with love and focus on the good that is possible.
We have to make love instead of hate.